Tim Cook: We killed the iPod Classic because we couldn't get the parts

Denies he's an axe murderer in Hammer Horror explanation

Tue Oct 28 2014, 17:22

APPLE CEO TIM COOK has used the week of Halloween to admit that the real reason for the demise of the iPod 'Classic' was that Apple could no longer get the parts.

With the manner of a car mechanic sucking though his teeth and tutting about 'having some right cowboys in here', Cook told the WSJ.D Conference in Laguna Beach: "We couldn’t get the parts any more, not anywhere on Earth."

Then as the mood darkened and suddenly sounded more like Victor Frankenstein denying a blood lust in killing his monster, he continued: "It wasn’t a matter of me swinging the axe, saying 'what can I kill today?'

"The engineering work was massive, and the number of people who wanted it very small. I felt there were... reasonable alternatives."

This last quote is best read in a faux German accent by a man with wiry grey hair and a lab coat.

Mr Cook (who clearly hasn't heard of 3D printing) was referring to the quiet cull of the iconic device just weeks from its 13th birthday. The click-wheel music and latterly microscopic video player was revolutionary at launch, offering 5GB of music in the palm of the hand.

By the time the parts ran out, the Classic, as it had become by then, boasted 160GB of storage and, for all its faults, not least the precarious nature of its mechanical hard drive, remains unique, having seen off rivals of every size (*cough* Microsoft Zune *cough*) and becoming the de facto standard for a generation.

It's a claim he seems to be hoping will ring true of the Apple Watch, which he used the same candid speech to describe as "profound". We were unable to confirm whether Motorola similarly believes the Moto 360 which launched in the UK today was 'sage' or 'perspicacious'.

Despite the iPod Classic being slashed from the Apple Store, the modding community has continued work on it, using custom firmware such as Rockbox to extend the legacy, harvesting organs from other electronic devices to make the monster rise again.

A flash of lightning. An evil laugh. Silence.